Nothing Better

I was having a nice day, but had trouble getting motivated to get dressed.  There was more work than usual to do (shaving) and we’re dog sitting, so I had to deal with responsibilities that I wouldn’t have otherwise (plus that pathetic face when he had to be put into his crate).  Anyway, I soldiered through and got my girl on and let me tell you, I will never have a better day.  I may have days as good, but never better!

As I have done recently, I signed up for a shift at the art museum and then over to usher at Mercury, with two hours in between.  I decided to wear this cute dress with a sweater for the necessary warmth at the museum and to cover the low cut back on this dress (my back is not a strength of mine).

My shift at the museum could not have been more rewarding.  People (okay, mostly women) walking by complemented me on my dress, told me I looked lovely, liked my style.  Yes, my head swelled!  I spent quite a bit of time talking with a gentleman that looked almost like a Marine with a goatee, the last guy I thought I’d have a lengthy conversation with.  He was also from Cleveland.  We talked about what a great place we live in, he introduced me to his family, we talked about their plans after the exhibit.  He had an extensive conversation with this guy in a dress.  A complete nonissue.  I had a similar conversation with a husband and wife in from New Jersey.  The two toughest looking guys ended up being the absolute nicest.  Plus I got to play in the exhibit before the museum closed.  This would have made for a great day.

But, wait, there’s more!  I stopped at a restaurant a friend recommended and met the most wonderful human being.  She is the bartender and I’ll suffice as to say, my visit ended with HER asking for a hug (that’s usually me doing that).  We immediately bonded, we talked, shared, she gave me her number and I’m bringing a friend back there next week for drinks and dinner.  I still cannot believe my good fortune.  This could be my new art museum-related hang out.

Then over to Mercury for my ushering duties.  Many favorite volunteers were there, so I walked around hugging people and when many patrons I know came in, well, more hugs.  My face hurts from smiling all day on a day that I wasn’t quite feeling it when getting ready.  Sometimes you just never know…..


Top 10 R & B/Soul Songs #8

Strawberry Letter 23, The Brothers Johnson.  They had a handful of terrific songs, among them “I’ll Be Good For You”, “Stomp” and “Get The Funk Outta Ma Face”.  This is such a pretty song, soulful, perfect.  Enjoy!

Top 10 Joyful Experiences #3

These are actually two experiences, my annual readings at church.  My first time was January 8, 2017.  I wore a cute black and white sweater dress with black leggings.  The picture on the right was taken by the angel known as my wife.  I was given a brief reading, so I played it up, using full dramatic impact with my voice.  This was an uplifting experience and one that really brought home the fact that no one really cares that I am wearing a dress.  We can all look for excuses why we cannot go out dressed and many of those are legitimate, but to say society is not accepting is not one of them.  I know and I know from significant personal experience.

This past March I was blessed to be able to do so again.  I wore a beautiful hounds-tooth jacket with matching black skirt and used pink accessories to complement the look.  I was brimming with confidence and received many complements, some weeks later, on my reading.  During out greeting period, a gay member of our congregation planted a kiss on my cheek.  I think that means I did okay….


So I’m Waiting For The Light to Turn Green……..

…….and she pulls in front of me.


An omen?


Big week coming up for me.  I have a friend (don’t act surprised!) from St. Louis and we seem to have quite a bit in common.  She is a triathlete, I am a broken down old racehorse, out to pasture (I’d say out to stud but those days are long gone).  We both enjoy much the same music, sports and have similar interests.  She will be visiting our fair city for a competition and I’ll be giving her the Kandi tour!  Dinner, the Rock Hall, my blathering, whatever else she want to do as she doesn’t get out as much as this old lady.  This will occur on Thursday and Friday and you can bet, I’ll blog all about it (with her permission)!  This will be fun for me and I hope, she doesn’t scurry from town before she wins her triathlon.



Morning at the Museum

I took a morning shift at CMA, working the Yayoi Kusama, Infinity Mirrors exhibit, on loan from The Smithsonian.  This day I served as the main greeter to visitors as they enter the museum.  I worked alongside a delightful fellow volunteer.  She was very nice, interesting and we had many similarities in our backgrounds as I learned over the course of my shift.  We greeted visitor after visitor, I welcomed quite a few out-of-towners to Cleveland and offered tips and advice to many that were about to enter the exhibit.  Apparently I smiled a lot because when I got back into my car, I noticed the raccoon look going again.  I may have to make an adjustment by not putting mascara on my lower eyelashes.  I smile with my eyes, making the raccoon look when I do.

It was a short day for me as I headed back to reality after my shift with somethings that needed to be tended to.  I was very pleased with my outfit, getting a few complements on it as well as one wonderful woman complementing me on my figure.  This is my office woman look.  Since the museum is so cold, I chose a NY&Co blouse (my favorites), coupled with an adorable Eva Mendes (also NY&Co) floral skirt, an outfit I’ve been looking forward to wearing.


Circumstances, we all have them.  As it relates to the subject matter of this blog, you may have a spouse.  She may be 100% supportive or completely disdain this part of you.  You may have complete freedoms as it relates to your dressing or are in either a DADT (don’t ask, don’t tell) or secretive circumstance.  You may dress but be fearful of leaving your home.  Your wife may support you dressing at home but will not allow you to leave the home.  Maybe it’s vice versa.  I could go on and on with various scenarios.

While I am blessed to have the freedoms I have as a crossdresser, there are many things I do not have.  Without divulging some of my personal circumstances, there are many things you all do daily without thought that I cannot.  I have been through hell on Earth with a business failure and the legal collateral damage it all caused.  Well over 15 years later, I still deal with it and think about it every single day.  My circumstances.

While I am by no means complaining, we are solidly middle class and want for nothing, but my reality is that I will work until I die.  There will be no complete retirement for me.  My circumstances.  I drive a 12 year old car, my wife drives an eight year old car.  They get us where we are going, but are certainly not luxurious.  My circumstances.  Because I am self-employed, I am unable to generate health care benefits.  So my wife has to work full time at a job she hates.  That kills me each and every day.  She accepts and understand this, but it will always bother me.  My circumstances.

Unfortunately, this is how life works.  I am told frequently how lucky I am for allowing Kandi to flourish.  I completely agree and never take it for granted.  But I am sure there are parts of your life that would make me envious, that I would trade places to have.  I also know that many of you deal with far more than I could ever imagine, every day difficult.  We all have portions of our lives where we are blessed and portions we wish were better or easier.  Health, both physical and mental, are of tantamount importance.  Without that it is difficult to get through the day and puts a drain on personal resources.  If you have these, you are fortunate.  I do and am thankful for that.  With my issues and benefits, I consider myself very blessed and try to acknowledge that frequently.

Yes, I am fortunate to have the circumstances that have allowed Kandi to bring me such joy.  But for everything we get, there are things we do not get or difficulties that balance that all out.  My purpose here is one of support and to show those that have the circumstances to get out, but chose not to do so for fear of the unknown, that the world is far more accepting that you believe.  Yes, I get out.  Yes, I am accepted in doing so.  Yes, I am blessed.  My circumstances.