Jocelyn’s Journey

By Jocelyn Johnson

When I was in my early thirties (1980’s) I had my first desire to wear women’s clothes. I wish I could tell you why this feeling came over me, but I don’t know why. I purchased lingerie, a dress, pantyhose, heeled slingback shoes, wig, purse and makeup. I modelled them at home a few times and experimented with different makeup styles.

But I never wanted to just sit around the house, I had to walk the sidewalks of neighboring towns and be seen by people (but not noticed)! Not only did I walk around, but I ventured into a couple of stores to buy gum or look at women’s clothes. I was very, very nervous, but determined to do it. Most people I passed made no recognition of me, but sometimes I did hear some laughs after I passed by. One time out I was called a “faggot” and laughed at. Another time out I was laughed at and I heard someone say about me: “there goes one that needs an operation”. I was also chased down the street once, but got away in my car. I really enjoyed the feeling of presenting as a woman. I also did not tell my wife. Eventually I pressured myself into purging it all and tried to suppress that urge.

A few years ago (2018) I was “surfing” the internet and came across pictures of beautiful crossdressers and Tgirls. Feelings came flooding back to me. I also went on YouTube and saw videos of many people presenting as women. I knew I had to resume my feminine presentation. One such mature YouTube Tgirl I noticed was on sidewalks I had walked decades ago. She was very well dressed and poised as she walked. I thought she was very classy and beautiful. Her name was Alison.

I started to stock my closet again with lingerie, a skirt, a few tops, pantyhose and flats and pumps. I was able to make contact with Alison. This was very special to me because I had someone from my neighborhood who I could share my thoughts and get expert advice. This was Jocelyn‘s “tipping point”. Alison initially said she had been dressing since an early age, but never ever thought she would have a friend or acquaintance. She was also unsure if she wanted any. We did exchange many emails over the months and sent pictures of each other back and forth. Alison gave me many tips on wigs, makeup, dresses, shoes and presentation style. She also told me about blogs such as Kandi’s and Stana’s Femulate and about YouTube dressers I should see and learn from. [Editorial comment: wow!]

I ventured out many times over the next year with none of the issues that I came across decades earlier. I was filled with joy as people accepted me for the woman I was.

I wanted to meet Alison face-to-face, and Alison agreed to meet in a safe and open environment. What a thrill for me to actually be out in public talking with someone like me. We met in a park by the water of the bay. Both of us were dressed very casual in leggings/jeans, running shoes, light tops and carrying purses. A brief walk on a path, passing many people, and then sitting on a park bench. We talked for two hours, sharing a lot about each other. Alison was surprised that we had spent that long together.

We went our separate ways back home. It was then I realized we hadn’t taken a picture of ourselves. How frustrating! But pictures of each of us are shown here. My picture is a closeup selfie taken shortly after our meeting. The two pics of Alison are showing off a coloured skirt and a “rockabilly” swing dress she has just purchased.

Alison and I acknowledge how wonderful it was to get together and we plan on doing it again soon. I have friends over the internet, email and blogs, but nothing compares to sitting next to a friend and just talking. Thanks Alison, dear friend.

Well!!! I do have Alison’s permission for the story content and the two pictures of her.

That is what we do here at Kandi’s Land! Bringing beautiful people together since 2017.

2 thoughts on “Jocelyn’s Journey

  1. Meeting another person like yourself is what I believe the best therapy. I remember the conversation that I had with the first crossdresser which was 40 years ago like it was yesterday. It was like she was reading my mind. It changed my life.


    1. Thanks Terri.
      It is very comforting when you are with someone who understands you, and you them. The sharing is special.


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